In the world of homeschooling, we constantly seek ways to enhance our teaching methods, foster our children’s growth, and maintain a productive learning environment. While there are countless strategies to achieve these goals, James Clear’s insights from his book Atomic Habits offer a compelling framework for creating lasting, impactful changes. Clear delineates three layers of behavior change: outcomes, processes, and identity. By understanding and applying these concepts, we can revolutionize our homeschooling approach.
The Three Layers of Behavior Change
- Changing Your Outcomes The first layer is about altering your results—losing weight, publishing a book, or achieving academic milestones with your children. This is the most superficial layer and often the starting point for many people. In a homeschooling context, this could mean aiming for higher test scores, completing a curriculum, or ensuring your child excels in specific subjects.
- Changing Your Processes The second layer focuses on modifying your habits and systems. This involves the routines and practices that drive your day-to-day activities, such as implementing a new study schedule, creating a clutter-free learning space, or establishing a regular reading time. By refining these processes, you create a more efficient and effective homeschooling environment.
- Changing Your Identity The third and deepest layer is about transforming your beliefs—your worldview, self-image, and judgments about yourself and others. This layer is crucial because your behaviors are a reflection of your identity. For instance, if you see yourself as an organized and dedicated homeschool parent, you are more likely to adopt habits that align with that identity.
The Power of Identity-Based Habits
Many people begin the process of changing their habits by focusing on what they want to achieve, leading to outcome-based habits. However, if we want lasting effects, it is more effective to start by focusing on who we wish to become. This approach is about starting with a vision and understanding our “why.” As Simon Sinek emphasizes in his book Start with Why, knowing your purpose provides a strong foundation for lasting change.
Behavior that is incongruent with the self will not last. The ultimate form of intrinsic motivation occurs when a habit becomes part of your identity. The more pride you have in a particular aspect of your identity, the more motivated you will be to maintain the habits associated with it. True behavior change is identity change. Your behaviors reflect your identity. Research shows that once a person believes in a particular aspect of their identity, they are more likely to act in alignment with that belief. The biggest barrier to positive change at any level is identity conflict. Good habits can make rational sense, but if they conflict with your identity, you will fail to implement them.
Here’s the ironic thing: your identity emerges from your habits. The more you repeat a behavior, the more you reinforce the identity associated with that behavior. The word “identity” comes from the Latin words essentia, which means being, and identidem, which means repeatedly. Your identity is literally your repeated beingness.
Implementing Identity-Based Habits in Homeschooling
Whatever your identity is right now, you only believe it because you have proof of it. Every action you take is a vote for the person you wish to become. Small habits can make a meaningful difference by providing evidence of a new identity. If a change is meaningful, it is significant. When you see what you are capable of, you gain self-validation, which in turn changes your identity.
This transformation can be achieved through an easy two-step process:
- Decide the Person You Want to Be (Vision) Determine the kind of homeschool parent you aspire to be. Do you want to be organized, patient, creative, or disciplined? Define this vision clearly and keep it in mind as you plan your days.
- Prove It to Yourself with Small Wins (Self-Validation) Start incorporating small, consistent habits that align with your desired identity. For instance, if you want to be more organized, begin by decluttering one area of your home each day. If you want to be more patient, practice mindfulness or take a few moments to breathe before responding to stressful situations.
Conclusion: Becoming the Homeschool Parent You Wish to Be
Identity change is the North Star of habit change. You have the power to change your beliefs about yourself. Ultimately, your habits matter because they help you become the type of person you wish to be. They are the channel through which you develop your deepest beliefs about yourself. Quite literally, you become your habits. The real reason habits matter is not just because they can get you better results (although they can), but because they can change your beliefs about yourself.
By adopting identity-based habits, you can transform your homeschooling experience. Embrace the vision of who you want to become and take small, consistent steps to validate this new identity. As you do so, you’ll find that not only do your outcomes and processes improve, but your entire approach to homeschooling becomes more aligned with your true self, leading to a more fulfilling and effective educational journey for both you and your children.
