Homeschooling always starts with such good intentions, doesn’t it? Fresh notebooks, color-coded schedules, detailed lesson plans—we launch into the year full of excitement and determination.
And then, a few weeks in, reality sets in. Lessons take longer than we planned. The toddler interrupts. The teen rolls her eyes at the carefully prepared activity. Suddenly, the joy we imagined feels replaced with stress, heaviness, and maybe even guilt.
So how do we lighten up? How do we bring more play into homeschooling and motherhood so the journey feels less serious and more joyful?
Why Lightness Matters in Motherhood and Homeschooling
The Savior said, “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Chieko Okazaki, in her book Lighten Up!, reminds us that the ordinary tasks of daily life are not distractions—they are spiritual opportunities:
“The daily activities of mixing orange juice, making telephone calls, supervising homework, and scrubbing the bathtub are not distractions from our spiritual lives. They are the vehicles through which we live our spiritual lives.”
Your homeschool doesn’t need to feel heavy to be meaningful. Lightness and joy are part of God’s plan for you and your family.
Why We Slip Into “Heavy” Mode
Many homeschool moms fall into three traps:
- Guilt: believing play or rest is a waste of time.
- Comparison: looking at other families and feeling behind.
- Perfectionism: trying to prove worth through flawless lessons.
Okazaki counsels:
“Only you know your circumstances, your energy level, the needs of your children… Don’t compare yourself to others—nearly always this will make you despondent.”
And Brené Brown adds this about perfectionism:
“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame.”
Comparison and perfectionism won’t lighten your load. But play can.
The Science of Play (Stuart Brown)
Dr. Stuart Brown has spent decades studying play. His conclusion?
“The opposite of play is not work—it’s depression.”
Play is a biological need, like food and sleep. It strengthens memory, lowers stress, builds resilience, and deepens relationships. Adding play to your homeschool doesn’t waste time—it actually multiplies learning and joy.
Discovering the 8 Play Personalities
Brown identifies eight ways people naturally play. Knowing your play personality (and your children’s) helps you build more fun into your homeschool:
- Joker – loves silliness and humor.
- Kinesthete – thrives on movement.
- Explorer – loves new ideas and experiences.
- Competitor – enjoys games and friendly contests.
- Director – loves planning and organizing.
- Collector – finds joy in gathering or cataloging.
- Creator/Artist – thrives on making and building.
- Storyteller – loves narrative and drama.
Think about yourself and your kids. Which ones describe you? Which ones describe them? Then ask: How can we bring more of this into our homeschool?
Brené Brown’s 3 Practices for Lightening Up
1. Cultivate Play and Rest
“It is in our biology to need rest and play. It is essential to our creativity and to our ability to stay grounded, yet somehow we’ve let these things slip away.”
Instead of pushing harder, give yourself and your children permission to rest. Rest restores. Play refreshes. Even a small pause can reset the tone of your day.
2. Cultivate Laughter, Song, and Dance
“Laughter, song, and dance create emotional and spiritual connection… They remind us… we are not alone.”
These practices cut through overthinking and reconnect us. A kitchen dance party, a silly joke, or singing during cleanup can instantly shift the atmosphere from stress to joy.
3. Cultivate Self-Compassion
“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best…”
Lightness grows when we stop hustling for worth and instead embrace joy in ordinary moments—dancing in the kitchen, laughing at the chaos, resting when we’re weary.
A Simple Challenge for This Week
Here’s your challenge:
- Identify your play personality and one for each of your kids.
- Choose one small way to bring that style of play into your homeschool this week.
- A race for your Competitor.
- A skit for your Storyteller.
- A scavenger hunt for your Explorer.
- A race for your Competitor.
And give yourself permission to laugh, rest, and release the guilt.
*Click HERE for a free quiz to discover how you and your children naturally play, as well as reflection questions and application ideas.