Questioning Our Thoughts: Finding Peace in Homeschool with The Work
As homeschool mamas, we carry a lot on our shoulders—lesson plans, laundry, meals, managing personalities, and sometimes that nagging thought: “I’m failing at this.”
But here’s something freeing: it’s not our circumstances that cause our stress, but the thoughts we attach to them. This idea comes from Byron Katie’s simple yet profound tool called The Work. And when we combine it with gospel truths, we find even greater peace, perspective, and power in our Christ-centered homeschooling.
What Is The Work?
Byron Katie teaches that every painful feeling starts with a stressful thought. The Work helps us question those thoughts and uncover the truth.
It’s built on four questions and a turnaround:
- Is it true?
- Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
- How do you react—what happens—when you believe that thought?
- Who would you be without the thought?
Then you explore turnarounds—opposite or alternative perspectives that may be just as true, or truer, than the original thought.
The Gospel Connection
Jesus Christ said, “Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:32). When we question false or distorted thoughts, we are freed from unnecessary suffering and invited into God’s truth.
The scriptures remind us that God’s timing is perfect:
- “All these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good” (Doctrine & Covenants 122:7).
- “My grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me” (Ether 12:27).
When we pause to question our thoughts, we’re really practicing discernment—separating truth from error, light from darkness.
Common Homeschool Thoughts We Can Question
Here are some examples you might recognize:
- “My child is behind.”
- “Other moms are doing this better.”
- “If I were more organized, our homeschool would be peaceful.”
- “I can’t handle this.”
When we hold these up to the four questions, something amazing happens: the heavy burden starts to lift. We remember that God didn’t ask us to be perfect, just faithful.
A Walkthrough Example
Let’s take the thought: “My child is behind.”
- Is it true? Behind compared to what—someone else’s standard?
- Can you absolutely know it’s true? Not really. Every child has their own pace, and God has a plan for their growth.
- How do you react when you believe that thought? Fear, pressure, impatience, and disconnection from your child.
- Who would you be without the thought? Present, loving, more creative in teaching, full of trust in God’s timing.
Turnarounds:
- “My child is right on time.”
- “I am behind in trusting God’s timing.”
- “I am behind when I focus on comparison instead of connection.”
Do you feel the shift? Instead of despair, there’s compassion and perspective.
Companion Worksheet: Try The Work Yourself
Here’s a simple practice sheet you can use whenever a stressful thought arises.
Step 1: Write down the stressful thought.
(Example: “I’m failing my kids.”)
Step 2: Ask the four questions.
- Is it true?
- Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
- How do you react—what happens—when you believe that thought?
- Who would you be without that thought?
Step 3: Turn it around.
- To the opposite
- To yourself
- To the other
Find at least one genuine example where each turnaround might be as true as the original.
Step 4: Pray and ponder.
Ask Heavenly Father to confirm the truth to your heart. Record any impressions.
Final Thought
Homeschooling is not about proving ourselves—it’s about walking with God, one step at a time. As you practice questioning your thoughts with The Work, you’ll find more peace in your home and more joy in your discipleship.
Next time you feel overwhelmed, pause. Write down the thought. Question it. And remember: God’s reality is always kinder than the story in your head.
Want to dive deeper? Listen to this week’s episode of The Joyful Homeschool Podcast where I walk through examples, share personal stories, and connect The Work to gospel truths for homeschool moms.