As a home-school mother, I have been asked this question on multiple occasions. I believe the question is sincere and well-intentioned. We are cultured to believe there is a list of what each of our children needs to know to be successful in life. When I first started homeschooling, I had the same question. I had the same worries and concerns. I wanted to know I was “doing it right.” I wanted to make sure my child was on “grade level” and hitting all the “regular” benchmarks.
Back then, I was always taking my marching orders from outside voices–people I didn’t even know–those who were the so-called experts. I didn’t really question or think critically. To a certain degree, I went along with the culture of those around me who seemed to have things figured out. Now, I can’t believe that was my question. Now, when others ask me this question, I always want to return the question with another question. “Who are you trusting to decide what your child is supposed to know?”
Let’s review the history of education in America. In the article, “Stop Stealing Dreams, What is School For?” by Seth Godin as well as A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver DeMille a summary of the history of American education is outlined. Godin reminds us that public education was actually invented in 1918 to get kids out of factories. The education system was designed to create more obedient, effective, and submissive workers. Demille labels the public school system as “The Conveyer Belt” system. The goal of this system was not for children to learn to think, but to learn WHAT to think. It wasn’t designed to educate leaders but employees prepared to meet the needs of an industrialized society. It was to train people to do what they were told and be efficient at it. It was modeled after the Prussian education system. This is why children today still often sit in straight rows, are divided by age, and start and end class with a bell. Another part of this education model that is deeply ingrained in most of us living in America today is the idea of having reference points of national averages where every child is measured against other children and then given a “percentile rank” in comparison to other children.
Because most of us are trained to think in this way, we never determine our own reference points. Instead, we adopt society’s reference points for success. Teaching (and living for that matter) with outside reference points lends itself to feeling extreme pressure and a feeling of never being enough or doing it right. What do you think are the long-term effects of this? Did you know that you can determine your own reference points? Rather than government agencies deciding what my reference points for success are, I have found a much healthier educational approach is to support my child in their individual growth and unique abilities. Every one of my children would be considered gifted and talented in some areas and greatly lacking in others if compared to other children, but I find that comparison to be pointless.
Rather than have a state-controlled curriculum, doesn’t it make much more sense to individualize each child’s education for their unique God-given mission? Rather than having external reference points, doesn’t it make much more sense to measure a child’s growth against themselves and their own capacities? Rather than filling a child with knowledge (that is so easy to come by nowadays) as if they were a vessel to be filled, doesn’t it make much more sense to help them develop the skill to know how to apply that knowledge? To know HOW to think? How to serve and how to problem solve?
I invite you to intentionally determine your own reference points for success in your homeschool. As you reflect on these questions, consider the profound impact of stepping away from society’s predetermined standards and embracing a more individualized approach to your child’s education. Trust in your ability, with God’s guidance, to nurture a learning environment that truly aligns with your child’s unique potential and purpose.
